excitement...

It was quite a crazy 2 weeks. Started 2 weeks ago with army from Monday till Wednesday. Officer's planning retreat from Friday to Saturday. Saturday morning was a rush to MO*E to sign the teacher agreement, then back to the retreat. This week was NI*E admin week. Spent Monday, Wednesday to Friday at N*IE. Yesterday was Family Day, Sentosa. Then sent Jun*hao off at night. It was a crazy 2 weeks.

After a day resting, slept for about 2 hours, I feel better.

Actually, after finishing the proposal for HQ, I feel WAY better. Haha, I know some of them read this. But really, finishing the thing really freed up so time. I hope I can siam more things. Need to find something to increase my evasion skills.

Okie, tomorrow, school at New Tow*n starts. I'm excited. I had a talk with She*ow En about it today at lunch. I think he made a good point about how I should have tried to get into Fa*irfield. Each school is different. Even though New T*own might be a good experience, it would not help me in learning how to best teach in Fairfi*eld. But it's too late. I'm going tomorrow.

I hope I can blog about something good tomorrow.

tired...

I'm tired. I think there are seriously way too many things going on. There's not enough time for everything. It has only been the first week of "work" and I'm wondering how I'm going to be able to do all these things. So I've been offloading things I can offload and dragging stuff that I cannot.

There's basically hasn't been enough alone time. I need some solitude.

spot the mistake...

See if you can spot the mistake.

I was bored waiting in a post office and this was nearby.

Well, have you got an answer? If you picked the word "use", you're right!


It should in in past tense, "used".

why???

I always wonder why some people buy their food before they have a place to sit to eat. Then they carry their tray and wander in a crowded food court hoping to get a seat.

Miracles don't happen everyday.

medics...

Something happened today at army that quite disgusted me. I was watching another medic from another unit practice how to use the AED. It's an automated electronic defibrillator. It delivers an electric shock that helps correct irregular heartbeats.

I watched that guy helplessly answer all the questions wrongly and wondered how he ever passed his course. Which brings up the question of how 11 weeks of training can ever be enough to equip a medic to be responsible for the lives of so many men. While I cannot always say that I know everything there is to know, at least I know my basics. This guy was giving random answers hoping they were right. I was disgusted.

I'm so glad that this guy is not my medic. I would have had a heart attack knowing that my life was not in good hands. Maybe that's another reason they introduced the AED. But the, that's the catch-22, if the people who are suppose to use them don't know how, then what's the use of the equipment.

jumper...

Due to a lack of time online from army, this is a backdated dream entry.

On Monday morning, I had a dream about a jumping man. More accurately, a man jumping.

If you have been in Fairfield before, you will know that the building that the auditorium is on the ground story of the 2 story Technical Block. Anyway, in this dream, we were having a BB camp. I cannot fathom why else we were there at night. I was walking out of the audit with Be*n, E*ric and J*oel. Outside in the parade square, we saw an Indian man waving frantically at us. We walked into the parade square and saw another Indian man standing on the ledge on the second story. We watched as the man on the second story jumped and the man in the parade square caught him in his arms.

sleepy...

I'm tired. But I guess, I was asking for it.

Yesterday, went to fico. It was fun I guess. Supper after was just as entertaining, if not more. The 田蛙 congee was nice. Well, Ju*n sent B*en back first and I reached home at about 1ish. So tried to sleep and I couldn't. I wasn't too sure when I fell asleep, probably near 3, but I think I was lying there was quite long. Woke up at 6. Went to army. Was quite hard to stay awake while they went through stuff that was "repeatative".

I feel sleepy.

clousure...

FINALLY, after 1 email, 3 phone calls and 3 weeks of waiting, the parcel is here.

I'm happy. More relieved actually. Life is back on track. woot!

Anyway, I spent dinner with one Wen*jie and Nat today. I feel compelled to blog down some of parts of the conversations that we had.

Nat: There is a ton of holiday homework lah! Actually, it's more like a thousand of tons of homework. What's a thousand tons?
WJ: That's a kiloton. Wah megaton. Megatron.
Me: A Megatron is a tron multiplied by 10 to the power of 6.

We were talking about how kids usually answer parents with: hmm, arh, ya. So we concluded that parents shouldn't ask kids yes-no questions. Then the children will be forced to talk.

phobia...

Today, my conversation is peppered with results of Facebook quizzes.

So I've decided to write abit on a result of a Facebook quiz I took recently. This quiz I took gauges what I hide from people. And the answer is sensitivity. According to the quiz, I very concerned with how people perceive me. To a certain extent, I guess that's true.

Anyway, while I might be concerned with how people perceive me, I think I have a phobia is rejection. Haha, it might stem from being overly concerned with how people perceive me.

I just realised that over dinner, Debb*ie said she has a fear of all types of animals. Although, if it makes her feel any better, I know of many people who are shun animals.

would you?

A friend asked me what I thought of her plans to quit her job so that she can start a travel-blog. Travel full time being supported by her blog.

One of the things that we talked about included the idea of moving out. In a westernised country, children are expected to move out when they go on college (what we call university). But in our asian culture, children can stay with their parent's till they get married. if you get married at 45 you move out at 45. So if you are not planning to get married, let's just say you better have a good relationship with your parents. There is this thing with how parents tend to be overprotective with their children.

I was rereading Angels and Demons today and there was a portion that explained how God could be both omnipotent and benevolent at the same time. If God were both omnipotent and benevolent, then how could he allow anything bad to happen to us? The book actually provides a good explanation. Take for example a parent and a child. If the child were to ask to skateboard, would the parent say no? More likely, the parent would warn the child of certain dangers but still allow the child to skateboard. The child may fall but that's part of learning.

What's the point of this story? Parents bringing up their children in the western hemisphere, will more likely say go ahead, if you fall, I hope you learn something. Parents in the eastern hemisphere will probably say no, I know better and if you still do it and fall, don't come crying to me.

How does the point then connect to this entry? We need to encourage a better learning environment. The question of dropping everything and doing something as unorthodox as this is frowned upon. But the point is, many people want to, but probably find a reason not to. The biggest question is for parents, (whom I don't think many read this blog) is your love limiting or supporting your child?

qt...

I haven't been doing QT recently. Maybe that's a reason why I'm not entirely sure why life seems to be falling apart. Falling apart = NIE not getting back to me, not knowing if I'm actually entering into this NIE cohort.

So I decided to do QT. I just did it. Anyway, I'm doing this daily devotional by John Piper. Over the semester, I've been doing it quite regularly, but since exams started and semester ended. I haven't really read it. And usually, not usually, all the time when I use to read the devotional, there always seems to be something in the devotional that would speak to me. I don't do the book everyday, so yea, when I do it, it speaks to me.

However, when I did it just now, I felt lost. I can't see how this applies to me, how it applies to my life right now, how it puts my life into perspective. I think one of the things that I'm most afraid of is not being able to comprehen. It was talking about yuppies being yucky missionaries.

I'm lost.

I think I need to get back into the groove. Maybe then, I'll be able to understand the direction that my life has taken. 2 months ago, I said I couldn't understand why God would have me write an article on looking for a job in this current time. I was accepted into NIE. I was set. Now, I'm not so sure. Maybe the article was in preparation for this fiasco.

I need to read Jeremiah 29:11.

signs...

I wonder if yesterday night's dream had any subtle message. Of course not every dream has a message underneath. Considering where I am right now in my life, I would say that the dream was pretty random and probably meaningless.

I dreamt that all the EL majors had failed one module and everyone was deciding which module to take next semester. Creepy.

cranky...

Am I cranky? Maybe. If there was a Facebook quiz that measured my level of crankiness, I'd say that I'm 40-50% cranky. That's a good gauge. At least I think so. Some people obviously don't. A certain certain somebody thinks I sound cranky too often. Fortunately, I don't have to care too much about what this certain certain someone thinks. So for this person I give a, "Whatever!". As I found out in another Facebook quiz, I hide my insecurities by dismissing them with a healthy helping of the word, "Whatever."

Anyway, back to the point at hand. I'm not cranky. At least I hardly would believe that. Maybe it's a side effect of being too nice to people that need to be nice to. And the people I'm more comfortable with ends up with a whole lot of cranky. I mean I try to be nice to everyone, BUT, that's hardly a realistic expectation. Only human.

I was mean the other day to a friend. It wasn't the sarcastic, subtle, you've-got-to-read-in-between-the-lines kind of mean, it was an all-out-overt mean. Well, it was funny so we had a good laugh. But she did say something that got me thinking. Was I naturally nice pretending to be mean (at that moment), or was I naturally mean pretending to be nice (all the time)?

I like to think it's the former. If it were the latter, it would be really tiring just hanging around people. Pretending to be nice, ALL THE TIME. That's a whole lot of pretending. If I could do that, I'm so moving to Hollywood. Okie, I'm digressing.

I'm trying to be less sarcastic. I'm trying.

a test...

I am beginning to wonder if MOE's lack of action is a test. A subtle test to see how badly I want to become a teacher.

Honestly, they are testing my patience. After the call on Monday, they haven't done anything. So today I called again. I asked how long does these things usually take. I got the answer of 3 working days. I also asked what other actions can I take if I don't receive any response after the 3 days. The lady replied that I can call them again. While I understand that all government agency take time to respond and there are usually a standard procedure to take, this seem to be taken to a new extreme.

I will wait till next Wednesday. I hope I don't have to call them anymore.

camp...

I'm back from camp and I definitely feel better. Camp was fun. Reminded me why I do the things I do.

camp...

It's camp again.

Half of me feels like I'll enjoy it. The other half feels too old.

At least it's going to peel me away from facebook.

3 days will pass in a jiffy.